did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
