oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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