so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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