He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
