what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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