Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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