sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
