What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
