So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
