I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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