So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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