Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
