woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
