he wants to bone in the snuggie
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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