She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
