a queef is a wish your heart makes.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
