its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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