I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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