Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
