Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
