just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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