Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
