where am i from again
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
