I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
