Christians are straight up FREAKS
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
