Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
