just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
