real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
