hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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