You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
