so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Sorry about my life...
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
