Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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