I'm drive I can fine osifer
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
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