I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
