Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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