So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
