I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
