ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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