I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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