he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
