my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
