I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
