Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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