just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
You know, be my cock's hype man.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
