Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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