she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
