Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
