i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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