I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
