Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Randomize
