How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
you would pick up someone in the library
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
