I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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