i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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