White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So much rum. So many feels.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
